This is a blog about my experiences as a new young Quaker in Britain. My background is a secular one (with a smattering of Catholicism from my grandparents) so I am approaching religion with fairly fresh eyes.
I found Quakerism through this YouTube video in July of this year. I had long been searching for a spiritual home, but I was distrustful of a lot of organised religion as a bisexual woman. I am also quite contrary by nature, so I struggle with being told what to believe but still wanted to feel supported by a community. As you can imagine, I was pretty convinced I wouldn't find anything that fit my profile! I wasn't actually actively searching when I came across the video - I'm just a fan of Jessica and tend to watch whatever she puts on her channel (if you like vintage beauty and disability activism I urge you to subscribe to her, her videos are always excellent). I was immediately intrigued by the incredibly accepting group she described and threw myself into research, listening to all of the Young Quaker Podcast (which is also excellent, by the way, and very much worth checking out) in a single day, all the while sat on my computer and reading as much as I could find on the subject. I discovered that my local meeting was having a meeting for worship followed by a picnic lunch the very next day, so I screwed up my courage and went along.
I have a severe anxiety disorder, so this was a pretty nerve-wracking thing for me to do - it can be quite scary to walk into a room of strangers, particularly if they are already a community, and though I'd prepared in the best way I knew how (research, research and more research) I was still afraid. I trembled as I walked in and was approached by a kind lady who welcomed me and offered me a cup of tea before the meeting started. That first meeting eased my mind, and by the time of the picnic lunch afterwards I was comfortable enough to converse naturally - astonishing to me at the time since I hadn't actually exchanged a word with anyone yet, just sat with them in the peace and stillness of meeting.
My initial experience of a meeting for worship was that of a comfortable silence. It allowed me to calm down and feel a sense of connection with the people in the room, something I often struggle with. I have been to many meetings since, but that first one is a fond memory for me. The sensation I find in meeting is very similar to the one I get when I stand on the beach and watch the sea - a calm joy.
I will be posting more about my experiences and perspective as a shiny and new young Quaker, including reflections on ministry given at meeting, my experiences getting used to interacting with Quakers as an organisation and as individuals, and what I think and feel as I learn and grow. This blog will be very Britain-centric as that's where all my experience comes from, so if you are a Quaker from elsewhere or have experience with them, I'd be intrigued to hear about it.
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